Trunk call

The British media has had a long love-affair with the elephant, on and off screen. Only one of the these pictures was posted yesterday via Twitter. 

Chelsea morning

Isn't life grand ?  John Simpson, currently somewhere in the Crimea for the BBC, keeps us up-to-date with his home life in the current edition of Highlife, the magazine of British Airways.

We knew he was moving to Ireland with his wife and their seven-year-old son. We hadn't spotted, that, just as his wife was packing for the removal men, he was approached to be President of The Chelsea Society, and has accepted. The invitation came at Cafe Colbert in Sloane Square, where the full English comes in at £16.50, though most of the menu is in French.

In the society, he'll be supported by vice presidents, the Earl of Cadogan, who apparently didn't renew the lease of the Oriel, where the Cafe Colbert now stands; Greg Hands, MP for Chelsea and Fulham, Deputy Chief Whip, Treasurer of the Royal Household, and reader of Highlife; and the Mayor of the Royal Borough of Chelsea and Kensington.

The Chairman of The Chelsea Society is lawyer Damian Greenish, of Pemberton Greenish, whose clients include the Earl of Cadogan. His offices are in 45 Cadogan Gardens, part of the Cadogan Estate.

Why don't you...

Conciding with the radio RAJAR figures comes the annual Ofcom report on "the communications market". Text-wise, it's a bit skewed to excitement about smartphones, tablets, and "meshing" - showing how clever you are by watching dull tv, and telling friends on Facebook how dull it is at the same time.

This is the chart that leaps out at me - how we spend our time in the UK, and the change over 5 years...  As ever, click to go large. Yes, 241 minutes is just over four hours - and it's an average.

Behind you

Starting the silly season early - where are our faves in panto this year ?  Two breakthrough artists - Gok Wan is making his debut as The Man in The Mirror, in Snow White at the Birmingham Hippodrome. Jo Brand will be be the Genie of The Ring in Aladdin at Wimbledon.

East Enders scriptwriters will be making creative storyline space for Ian Beale/Adam Woodyatt, in Peter Pan, Crewe, and Shane Richie/Shane Richie in Cinderella, High Wycombe. Shane Richie Jr is playing Buttons in Hayes.

Craig Revel Horwood is once again giving his Wicked Queen, this time in Southend, and without the support of Ann Widdecombe. Jimmy Osmond returns to Swansea as Captain Hook in Peter Pan. David Hasselhoff offers an alternative intepretation of the role in Nottingham.

We await news of castings in Hastings, Llandudno, and Northampton - may the producers have more success in their signings than Arsene Wenger....

Logan's run

Missed, amongst other University honours for BBC types, Leeds Trinity University installing Gabby Logan as their first Chancellor...

Capped

This blog has always liked a little dressing up, and whatever the rest of you think of Auntie, the UK's universities still love her. Here are some of this year's honorary degrees - costumes by Russell Grant, out of Rubovia.

I'm missing a few, so if anyone has undeveloped film of the following be-gowned, get in touch.

Carolyn Quinn, Honorary Doctorate, University of Kent.
James Landale, Honorary Doctor of Laws, Bristol University.
Paul Lewis (Money Box and Breakfast), Honorary Degree, University of Essex
Lord Hall of Birkenhead, Doctor of Letters, University of Birmingham

3.798836082 kilograms

The media triumph for the Royal Family is keeping news of the little erk's arrival quiet from 4.24pm to 8.05pm.

Ed Perkins, Press Secretary to Prince William, is from Pen-y-fai, Bridgend, and went to Bryntirion Comprehensive School. At 17, he completed the maximum three gold runs on Blockbusters. He graduated from Christ's College, Cambridge with a degree in geography, then picked up a Ph.D in epidemiology. On the way he edited the university newspaper, Varsity, and worked weekends at Radio Cambridgeshire.

He began a tv career as a trainee at ITV News, joining the BBC Six O'Clock team in 2002. In 2005, it was back to ITV as an assistant programme editor, thence to The Royal Household as Deputy Press Secretary to The Queen and Head of News in 2007.

In December last year, he was poached for Prince William's team.

Question masters

Lords Patten and Hall head to the Grimond Room in Portcullis House today for a grilling by MPs of the Culture, Media and Sport Committee.

Liberal leader Jo Grimond was generally a civilised and low-key politician, who only occasionally lashed out.  One such spasm was aimed at the Dimbleby dynasty.  He said the BBC was run by a cosy group of people who "think the same thoughts...live in the same circles, and even it seems if one dies, a successor is better to have the same name.  How many more Dimblebys have been employed by the BBC ? ... unless you are one of the dinner gongs to which the Pavlov's dogs of the media respond, you have little chance of being on it".

In 1970, David was presenting 24 Hours, Jonathan was presenting The World This Week on Radio 4, and Sally was employed as a BBC researcher.  43 years on, David is in the third year of a five year BBC contract, and still at the helm of Question Time after nine years. Jonathan Dimbleby has been chairing Any Questions ? on Radio 4 since 1987.  Sally went on from the BBC to be company secretary for a number of Dimbleby firms, and was last reported in the press failing to complete the Dittisham Regatta in 2012, finding the shallows of Tea Leaf Bay on the River Dimbleby Dart.

David's children are Liza, an artist; Henry, co-founder of fast food chain Leon, Government advisor on school dinners, author of a weekly food column in The Guardian, and contributor to Woman's Hour on Radio 4; and Kate, a jazz and folk singer, who featured on Woman's Hour last June.  Henry Dimbleby had a brief tv acting career at the age of 13 as Tom Dudgeon in BBC adaptations of Arthur Ransome's Coot Club and The Big Six.

Jonathan's son Dan trained as a chef, then had a career in tv, moving up from sound on Jamie's Kitchen, to producer on Masterchef. He now runs an ice-cream van company.  Jonathan's daughter, Kitty, writes occasionally for the Daily Mail, and has penned a book about being an army wife.

The Mourning Sword

The back page of the Order of Service for Lady Thatcher's funeral carries Wordsworth's Ode: Intimations of Immortality.

I can feel a parody of the whole document being prepared for this week's Private Eye...

Swingometer

The current generation of tv watchers voted with their remotes last night. After Margaret Thatcher's death brought rolling news and news specials, the EastEnders audience for BBC1 was 7.25m (close to thirty per cent share). The average audience for the hour and a half special narrated by Andrew Marr that followed was 2.48m (just under 10 per cent).

Next, the funeral.

Icy moon

Via media and horse-racing connections...

Whodunnit ?

Who are these people bringing France the shining truth of SPF50 and Royal Flesh ?  A closer look at the key staff of French magazine, Closer - if I find anything naughtier, I'll get back to you.

Elodie Mandel, "People and Fashion editor" of Closer, and author of the words with the pictures. She studied philosophy, before, in her own words, "going over to the dark side". Loves gossip and Louboutins.

Laurence Pieau, Editor in Chief of Closer. A journalist for Figaro Magazine from 1988 to 1995. She went on to work for Voici, France Dimanche and in 2003 launched Public magazine. Her French Wikipedia entry has been tampered with this morning... 

Ernest Mauri, President of Mondadori Magazines, the Franco-Italian publishers of Closer. Seen here at the French Grazia Ball for Paris Fashion Week in 2011 - theme "Eyes Wide Shut" - with Marina Berlusconi,  Chairman of Fininvest, Chairman of the Italian wing of Mondadori, and daughter of the former Italian Prime Minister. Yes, Fininvest is one of  Silvio's main investment vehicles.....

How others see us

I love Google Translate. The spirit of Professor Stanley Unwin is alive in the machine. Take this translation from the website of the French magazine, Closer.

A little over a year after their marriage, the royal couple was offered a romantic getaway, far from the protocol, etiquette in a very garden of Eden. Almost alone in the world ... For Closer was there ! Discover a preview of the pictures the world in 24h comment.  

After the holidays olé-olé Prince Harry in Vegas, discover the very sensual shots of Kate Middleton and her husband Prince William. Discover the incredible pictures of the future Queen of England as you've never seen ... and as you never see her again ! Find out tomorrow exclusively Closer photos that the world did not expect: the Duchess of Cambridge topless on the terrace of a guest house in the Luberon! OMG!   

Tomorrow Closer 

It is good to meet face-to-face with her husband, finally free of the daily worries, bows, media pressure. For their second honeymoon, William and Kate chose Provence for a romantic desire. Only the world. Their motto: holiday I forget everything, the greyness of London, and even the swimsuit in the suitcase remained of the height ... At Castle Autet, Kate perfect tan and smeared his body naiad a sunscreen spf 50 while William strums on his shelf. And to avoid tan lines, Kate thought of everything ... and remove the jersey.  

In pictures: A couple like many others who enjoy the sun between two hugs ... except that the future queen Kate and William is called to ascend the throne. Kate inventiveness and redouble sensuality to tickle his favorite driver. A splash in the pool and hop a swimsuit to dry! 

Do not miss this special edition of Closer exceptionally sale tomorrow.

Elodie Mandel

The code

The Las Vegas Convention and Visitors Authority is trying to get some momentum out of our Harry's shenanigans. It has placed an ad in a range of US newspapers with this important message...

“For shame! To those who traded in their pledge to their Las Vegas brethren, we deplore you. We are calling on you, the defenders of what happens in Vegas staying in its rightful place — in Vegas. We are asking for a shun on those exploiters of Prince Harry. We shall boycott partying of any kind with them. No bottle service. No bikini-clad girls. No Bucatini from Batali. In other words, we will not play with them anymore. Who’s with us?”

Gongs-a-go-go ?

Anyone else getting sniffs of a plan for a special Olympics honours list ?

Normally, gongs come in the next available slot - New Year or Birthday honours. After Beijing in 2008, every Olympic gold medallist ended up with an honour ranging from an MBE to a knighthood, though 17 of the 35 Paralympic champions got nothing at all. Just before London 2012, there were hints from Team Cameron that there would be no automatic honours this time - some vague concept of "giving back" would also have to be met.

Now apparently there is momentum behind a plan for a one-off set of honours, which may well be "automatic" - though what you give Sir Chris Hoy is clearly now problematic.

The BBC will probably seek some letters after their names for Roger Mosey and Dave Gordon; I reckon Clare Balding will have to wait until the next Birthday Honours.

Meanwhile I rather hope somebody at the BBC has a quick think about the shape of this year's Sports Personality of the Year award. Many think it would be demeaning to Team GB to choose between Mo, Jessica, Ben, Sir Chris, etc - and that creating a short-list of 10 would be just as invidious. Why not, for this one special year, just have a Sports Review of the Year (and party) without awards - ideally in an Olympic venue ?

Be good

Outside if wet

A director's nightmare, with George Entwistle on the gallery phone shouting "More boats !", all condensed into 3 minutes 18 seconds.

Fearless

I thought this might be a good weekend to collect pictures of broadcasters in wellingtons, but then again...

Dyke on a bike

If you're on the streets of Bovisand, Lostwithiel, Boscastle, Elmscott, Okehampton, Exeter and Dartmouth over the next few days, be watchful for of a party of eight 65-year-olds on bikes.  Greg Dyke and schoolfriends from his days as a 15-year-old at Hayes Grammar School are recreating a 300-mile ride round Devon and Cornwall, this time for charity.  When they first did the trip, it was longer - starting and finishing in London. This time they'll have a support vehicle, in Greg's words, carrying "oxygen and alcohol". But he promises they'll be attempting the same hills and staying in the same hostels.

Matters arising

Not a normal honours list for the BBC - very few current direct employees feature. The list must have been decided way before the Pageant, surely ?

There are awards for Wendy Austin, stalwart of news and current affairs broadcasting in Northern Ireland; Armando Giovanni Ianucci (though several on Twitter apparently think he should have turned it down); and Richard Henry Simpson Stilgoe, OBE DL, is knighted.

Michael Berkeley, composer and presenter of Radio 3's Private Passions, is awarded an OBE. Professor Ian Hargreaves, once John Birt's right hand man in BBC News is on the list; Jenny Agutter, currently starring as Ed's old flame Fiona in Radio 4's Ed Reardon is made an OBE for charity work; Anne Bulford, Chief Operating Officer, Channel 4, was once part of the BBC finance team; actor Kwame Kwei-Armah, made his name initially as paramedic Finlay in Casualty; former BBC Governor and Trustee Jeremy Peat gets letters but no knighthood yet; and there's a gong  for the Queen's favourite, Gareth Malone.

Jean Marsh and Gary Barlow are recent BBC hirings, with a little more ITV in their heritage.